I was listening to a testimony from a man that I cannot remember his name or the title of his book, but he talked about having an addiction to pornography for 9 years. He prayed and church pastors and members prayed for him and nothing seemed to help break his addiction, until he was finally able to receive a new understanding of his identity from God. He learned he, as a man was purposed to protect women, not lust after them. I found that to be some key information as I sought more knowledge and wisdom about a mans self image. Like I said, I could not remember his name or title of the book but I found some very important key points and examples in the Power of the Praying Wife by Stormie Omartian.
She writes, " How your husband see's himself as a man greatly affects your marriage and your lives together. You, as his wife, can play an enormous role in how your husband see's himself, because your prayers have great influence and power in his life. We women have no idea of the influence and effect we have on our husbands. Our rejection of them in any way can hurt them deeply and even ultimately beat them down. On the other hand, our open and gentle acceptance of them can encourage them to rise up and feel confident. As a wife, you may be feeling that you would certainly like the same kind of support from your husband that you are giving to him, but even if your husband doesn't pray for you in the same way- and many do not, so do not feel alone- God will reward you for your faithfulness to pray for him. Not only will you see answers to your prayers, but you will also sense a greater closeness with the Lord." ~ The Power of a Praying Wife, Stormie Omartian.
I have to say that men can be just as sensitive as women if not more. Be careful what you say to them and how you approach them. One, they do have a tendency to misconstrue our attempts to help them and comfort them. This is why it is so important to learn how to perceive and communicate with each other through patience and the willingness to forgive quickly. I had said some things to my husband over the years in anger and hurt, even jokingly. Some things were just references to the jokes and comments that were being made by himself. I had NO IDEA how deep he had buried those things in his heart and was allowing them to affect his own self image and confidence. He never told me how he felt. He just kept it inside and one day....POW! Blindsided with the truth of a hardness in his heart that had developed. I was shocked. I was more shocked that he refused my apologies. That's what happens with a hardness of heart. We take something into our hearts and let it sit there instead of handling it the right way and over time it turns us hard. We will discuss more of that topic later. I still asked my husband for forgiveness whether or not he would, because I truly was remorseful and because that is what the Lord ask us to do. If we have wronged someone we should ask for them forgiveness. It was another eye opener of how sensitive my husband was. That made me want to protect him more. It also showed me how strong he was because even though he held onto this hurt, he never treated me unkindly, until the enemy used it as weapon against me these many years later. That is also why its so important to reaffirm them with positive words, loving kindness, and prayer. You never know what is building up inside of them or how the enemy will use those things as weapons against you, don't give the enemy any tools. You have the opportunity to determine what bricks you are going to build up your husband with. That's what I am trying to get you to understand. We have been given a great power and opportunity regarding our husbands and even children.
Let's take 1 Corinthians 3:12-15 seriously;
12 If anyone builds on this foundation using gold, silver, costly stones, wood, hay or straw, 13 their work will be shown for what it is, because the Day will bring it to light. It will be revealed with fire, and the fire will test the quality of each person’s work. 14 If what has been built survives, the builder will receive a reward. 15 If it is burned up, the builder will suffer loss but yet will be saved—even though only as one escaping through the flames.
This verse causes us to take accountability for what we use to build up or tear down. The word of God gives us many instructions regarding the use of our words because words, spoken in faith, have the power of life and death. He has commanded us to choose life and speak with love and blessings. Let's bless the self image of our spouses. :))
Father, I ask you to reveal to my husband that "he is the image and glory of God" (1 Corinthians 11:7). and he is "complete in Him, who is the head of all principality and power." (Colossians 2:10). Give him the peace and security of knowing that he is accepted, not rejected by You. Free him from the self-focus and self-consciousness that can imprison his soul. Help my husband to find his identity in You. Help him to see his worth through your eyes. Enable him to see who You really are so he'll know who he really is. May his true self image be the image of Christ on his soul. Make my husband to be the man you created him to be. In Jesus' name I pray. Amen!
I am standing on this promise 2 Corinthians 3:18;
18 But we all, with unveiled face, beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory, just as by the Spirit of the Lord.
I pray it with thanksgiving saying...Thank you Lord that my husband is being transformed into the mirror image of Jesus, from glory to glory! Amen
(Think of it this way, if he becomes the image of God then he will love you like God! And His word says it can be done! We are created IN...HIS..IMAGE!)
How bout these..
I Declare my husband is predestined by the Father to be conformed to the image of His Son Jesus! Romans 8:29
My husband has put off the old man with his deeds, and has put on the new man who is renewed in knowledge according to the image of Him who ceated him. Colossians 3:9,10
Arise, shine, for your light has come! And the glory of the Lord is risen upon you.
Isaiah60:1
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