Blessing Your Husband Day 4, Who's Your DADDY?

I become more proud of my husband everyday as a father. I admit I was one that was always complaining about him not doing enough for his kids, not spending enough time with them, not disciplining them enough, not teaching them to respect me enough, not sacrificing enough. As I turned to the Lord in prayer asking Him to make my husband a better father, He started doing just that. He started teaching me that I needed to respect my husband and trust the Lord to operate through him, even when I didn't agree with my husbands ways. As I began respecting my husband as head of the house and his leadership, and submitting to his authority over my (I mean our) children, he started taking more of a leadership role. I don't have to yell, plead, or criticize. I just needed to allow him the room he needed to operate as himself, allow God to raise him up as a father, using the talents that was already provided in him. And yes, they differ from me. I am the aggressor, my husband is more passive, but for many years I have been out of line and out of order with the ways of the Lord. As He began to teach me and help me to correct myself, it has enabled Him to teach and correct my husband, as well as my children.

To give you an example, I often at times disciplined my children by yelling at them, that usually escalated to worse scenarios because then my husband would get upset with me because I am yelling and he thinks I am acting out of control. Now my blood pressure is rising and I am feeling disrespected and fearful that I am not controlling my children the way a parent should, and now their is a complete break down of communication and an atmosphere of strife and brokenness in the hearts and spirits of everyone involved. Besides the fact my husband and children have always had very quiet and gentle spirits and any yelling just tears them up. Me too when I am on the otherside. And yes, part of my tactics were learned behaviors and the fact that I didn't really want to follow through with disciplining them, so I would yell at them, demand, and threaten in attempts to motivate them into the outcome I wanted. Didn't always get my desired results, and usually ended up with them having less respect for me. Then I would just be mad and yelling at my husband, afterall, it's all his fault. Wrong! I have learned that I am not in control, I am not the one responsible for all the discipline, or the outcome. God is! Yup, it's His problem. I just needed to submit and follow His word and pray for my husband to be the kind of father GOD purposed him to be.

As I let go, I see my husband step up more and more to the plate. He is learning by trial and error just like we all do, but I see more and more of his strengths. See, he is more calm and patient, he approaches my children with a more gentle and comforting approach. He is a comforter and now that I understand that, I let him be. I cannot force him to be me, like I had tried in the past, and I thank God now that I can see that. I didn't want to be that kind of me.I can't believe that was me. Always hollering, complaining, nagging, and tearing my family down instead of building them up. Honestly I am broken hearted that I caused so much devastation in my family. But Jesus is the God of restoration and healing! He will teach us truth when we are willing to listen and obey and be blessed! Through my prayer and submission to God, my husband is now seeing the things I have had to deal with. At first he was like WHOA! Of course he wanted me to jump in, but I learned it was not my place and said no, this is for you to handle. My job is to support him, respect him, and acknowledge him. These teens are his to handle no matter what the outcome is. You know what. Its working. He is developing his strengths and talents and establishing order in our home God's way. He is teaching our children to respect me more, and there is much less strife in our household. I still have to remind them that mom still and will establish her authority too sometimes, but its not like it was, and I know when to turn to my husband now as well, and let him take over. Everyone is connecting more and smiling, it's becoming a safe environment, where everyone can be themselves. That's the way its supposed to be, but it had to start with praying and obeying DAD ( the Heavenly Father) and respecting and blessing our earthly father.

It just makes my flood gates want to pour open with thanksgiving to the Lord for what He has done, and its so much easier! It's not perfect,yet, but I will keep obeying my Lord and learning what I can to obtain more wisdom, I will keep praying for my husband so that he will be drawn more to the Lord and gain more understanding and wisdom. We are finally on the right path and it breaks my heart that so many homes are not able to operate in Gods purpose for family, because they don't know His word or how to. I have learned that the majority of fathers have a great desire to be a present and good father, a good provider. Being a failure as a father and provider is one of men's biggest fears. Stormie Omartian writes in The Power of a Praying Wife that the thoughts of failure and inadequacy are what cause so many fathers to give up, leave, become overbearing from trying too hard, or develop a passive attitude and fade into the background of their children's lives. (Sound like anyone you know? Can you say having a complaining, nagging, overbearing, angry wife, or one that pushes the father away causes the same issues to arise? We need to ask God to open our eyes to see their gifts and talents as well and accept them, affirm them as the fathers that they are. Be aware, men won't tell you this is what they are feeling either. They need to know that they are needed and important too!) Know our prayers can help redeem these situations as well.

"If they are tortured with doubt and burdened with a sense of responsibility, we can minimize these feelings with our prayers.Prayer can help them gain a clear perspective of what it means to be a good father, and open the door to Holy Spirit guidance on how to handle the parenting challenges" ~ Stormie Omaritian

Another fact is that men can be hurt by and become the molds of their own fathers. We can pray that God will help them to heal from the hurt of their fathers and draw them into spending more time in His presence, so they will learn to imitate Him and be healed of any misconceptions of what being a loving and involved father really is. Remember as wives, we have the power through prayer to pray changes into them and declare those things that are not in them to come into existence. I, for one, feel that my husband is still not as involved with me or his children as I feel is needed. Besides praying scripture I will continue to declare the opposite until I see the desired results manifesting (taking effect) in his being. I have finally begun to see suttle changes more and more, such as, I declare my husband is interested, affirming, verbally communicative, and involved with me and his children. I try to encourage and reward him as much as I can notice now so he will continue in these attributes. If I haven't affirmed him in a day or so I ask the Lord to open my eyes and show me what I am missing or what I can be appreciative of, or how can I bless him?

There is a really good prayer of healing and guidance for fatherhood in The Power of a Praying Wife but I would like to share these other prayers as I feel they are a little more direct about him being a father.

Let me just say too, that I am extremely thankful that my children's father is still in the home. That in itself is a miracle of God after everything that we have done to each other and been through, but that is the power and grace of God. TO HIM BE THE GLORY AND ALL PRAISE! I am also thankful that he has always been an excellent provider for me and my children. I did grow up without my dad in the home so I do know what its like. I refuse to accept that for my children. I DECLARE there will be no separation or legacy of divorce left to our children. I am breaking that generational curse right now! My children will live in the blessing and prosperity of the Lord! If you are a single mother reading this (or father) please know that you are not husbandless and your children are not fatherless. Turn to the Lord as He said He will be your husband and He will be the father of your children. Isaiah 54:13 says "All your sons (daughters) will be taught by the Lord, and great will be your children's peace!" Take hold of the promise and claim it! Speak it over your children and when they disrespect you and disobey you, go back to His word and promise and take your children to Him in prayer! Trust me, my kids know enough now that I threatened them just the other day to take them before the Lord. They were being so disrespectful and I had enough. I wasn't going to react in my old ways, and when I told them that, they shut up and changed their attitudes real quick. 2 Corinthians also says " I will be a Father to you, and you shall be MY sons and daughters, says the LORD ALMIGHTY!" You are not an orphan! Take hope! Malachi 4:6 says "He will turn the hearts of the fathers to their children, and the hearts of the children to their fathers.." Hold onto this one and don't let go of it! Keep confessing it with all your heart!

Now lets pray for our husbands;

Father, give my husband the grace to rule our house well, and teach our children submission with all dignity. I pray he submits himself to You and loves me as Christ loved the church. I thank You my husband rejoices in the wife of his youth and is still pleased to dwell with me and me alone! 1 Timothy 3:4, Ephesians 5:25, Proverbs 5:18 (A Wife's Prayer)

Thank You for Your favor on my husband's life because we are joined together. Give him wisdom to prioritize our lives and position him to be a wonderful provider.
Proverbs 18:22, 1 Timothy 5:8 (A Wife's Prayer)

Thank You that my husband is slow to speak and swift to hear what You are saying to him concerning our marriage and our children. Give his heart the desire to teach our children to love You and Your Word. I pray he creates a desire in the heart of our children to walk in Your ways. Keep him from those things that draw him away from You, things that produce death in families. James 1:19, Genesis 18:19, James 1:14

Thank You that my husband will not provoke our children to anger, but he tutors and trains them in the way they should go. I thank You my children will honor and respect him because he is a man of God. Ephesians 6:2,4 (Your children will be blessed for honoring their mother and father. Remember even if it doesn't reflect reality, you are praying the desired result.)

Thank You that my husband keeps his life submitted to the word of God and to prayer so he always has wisdom to lead our family. I pray he honors You for the hedge of protection You have placed around our lives. James 4:7, Job 1:10

I pray my children will see their father is a man of integrity who walks in righteousness in all that he does. Thank You that he is a strong example before our children, and for the sweet presence of Your Spirit who dwells in our home because of my husband's life. Thank You that my husband has taken his place as the priest of our home. 1 Kings 9:4, Timothy 4:12, Acts 2:2

Lord, my husband has been given the responsibility of training our children. Help him not to withhold correction when they need it. Give him wisdom in applying the rod of discipline. Thank You that when he disciplines them, he is rescuing their lives from hell. Your wisdom is necessary to raise our children. He will invest solid wisdom in their lives so our hearts can rejoice and we can make You glad, Father. Help us to train our children to use their mouths to speak what is right. Proverbs 23

You have granted wisdom in his fatherhood and blessed us in health, strength, submission, and obedience. The children and I are a delight to him and bring him praise and no burdens. Teach my husband to lead our household. May he sit with our children and teach them Your Word and Your ways as he lives and exemplary life, one that our children will honor, admire, and follow after. (A Wife's Prayer~ Pamela Hines)

Lord show my husband your ways and teach him your paths so that he can be a good husband and father. Guide my husband in your truth and teach him, for I know you desire to be his God and Savior. Psalm 25:4-5

Almost forgot this important one:

Lord, I pray for protection over my children and over our marriage. I invite You right now to build and establish our house, our family, and our marriage. I DECLARE that we will never be divided or torn apart. Give me and my husband great wisdom and revelation about how to raise our children. Help us to talk things through and be in complete unity, especially in the area of discipline and privileges. Let no issues of child rearing change his heart toward me or undermine our relationship. Give him wisdom and revelation about all aspects of child rearing and help him to be a great father to our children. In Jesus' name I pray.

There is so much more to this prayer. Please get the book for all the testimonies, guidance, and other prayers. The Power Of Prayer and the Deeper Issues of Marriage, Stormie Omartian

This is such an important topic. Fathers are more important and have a greater impact than they realize. Its time to wake up, stand up, and lift them up!

Blessing Your Husband, Day 3 Got Nuttin But Love For You Baby!

One version of scripture Proverbs 19:22 says "What a man desires is unfailing love." Only God's love is unfailing. We can bless our husbands by telling them of God's love, even quoting Jeremiah 31:3 "I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with loving kindness." I like to make it a prayer of thanksgiving. "Thank you Lord for loving my husband with an everlasting love and drawing him unto Yourself with loving kindness." This prayer is important because a man cannot love if he doesn't know or accept love from God. He won't be able to love God, love himself, or love his wife. I love what Greg Smalley has to say about love. He states love is not chemistry and love cannot be generated."In reality, there is no love that comes from us. We are not the originators. God is. 1 John 4:7-8 says that love comes for God and love is God. In verse 19 it goes on to say that we love because God first loved us. The point is that I do not generate a single drop of love. It all comes from God. By receiving God, I receive His love. I can then open my heart and share it with others. Love feels good to me, but I am just passing it through from God to others. By making a conscious decision, I can pass love through to my spouse. It helps the process if I see her as God sees her." Or in our case, as God sees him (valuable and precious.)He goes on to say that if a heart is closed to God, it will be closed to their spouse.
(www.smalleymarriage.com)

John 15:13 says, "There is no greater love than to lay down one's life for one's friends." We will substitute the word friend for spouse here (even though they should be our friend as well). God put it on my heart that He wanted me to lay down my life for my husband. That meant all my hurt, my pride, my desires, expectations, etc...you name it! I believe and have discovered many other women have been called and are doing the same thing. Love is a sacrifice, and it hurts, but it's not without a reward because LOVE IS GOD! A man wants unfailing love, that means a love that is unconditional, forgiving, a love that always protects!(quite complaining and gossiping to your friends and family!)(guilty as charged on that one. :( A love that always trusts (and is trustworthy!). (and that one), always hopes, and always perseveres. (I got those down!) Let God fill your heart with love and good treasures for your husband. Remember love never fails. Love always conquers! Because....Love..Is...God!

Keep in mind if you pray for yourself and not him, you will never find the blessings and fulfillment you want. What happens to him happens to you, and you can't get around it. ~ Stormie Omartian ( The Power of a Praying Wife)

Let's love him through prayer:

Oh, Father, today let me just love him. Pour Your love into me in such a powerful and complete way that I am just bursting with You. Teach me how to pour Your love out over my husband. Father I ask You to place Yourself before my husband today. Lord please surround him and place men of God in His path that will love him, encourage him, support him, and be an example of You to him. Overwhelm him with your unfailing love. Let him see reminders that You are in relentless pursuit of him and that your passion for him will never fade. Lord, I ask You to surround him with You. Fill his morning, noon, and night with your presence. In The Name Of Jesus, Amen(Winning Him Without Words ~ Lynn Donovan and Dineen Miller)


Thank You for strengthening me to be available to my husband in order to meet his needs, and for binding us together in love. Because You have poured Your love into my husband, he loves me as you love the church. As an act of my will, I will submit to my husband and reciprocate Your perfect love toward him. Father, I thank You that I am my husband's gift from You. I love him and he loves me. The love we have for each other is Your love. This love is unconditional, it is faithful, it is loyal, filled with integrity and honor. It is self sacrificing. (This prayer you will want to keep praying and confessing daily until you see Gods power bringing it to pass in your marriage) Thank you for delivering him from worry, stress, and fear, and filling all the voids in his life with your love, power, purpose, and divine direction.

Thank You for delighting him and delighting in him, I pray You will do something phenomenal for him. Do it, Father, in a way so he knows it was only You. Thank You for touching him and allowing him to experience You in a real and living way.

Father, Your word instructs me to love my husband and, through my prayer, I manifest that love. You made me a wise woman. Therefore I build my house through prayer and thank You for helping me to maintain a strong foundation in You for my household. After You, my first concern is my husband and how I may please him. Thank you for continually drawing him near to Your heart. In Jesus' name, Amen.
(A Wife's Prayer ~ Pamela Hines)

Blessing your husband-Day 2

I learned a long time ago ( I often forget) that in order for someone to be promoted or receive certain blessings you have to bless your head. God is a God of order, so it pleases Him when we bless our husbands, bosses, church leaders, etc. I know, you may say or feel that your husband doesn't deserve it. The trick is praying your husband UP into your expectations. Act and pray like he deserves and eventually he will line up to that and act like he deserves it too! If you want to be promoted, promote him. You want to be blessed, bless him.You want to be honored,honor him.

I have also learned that men have a very strong need to feel like they have something for themselves, a reward for their hard work. Not feeling like they are always working to just give everything over to the family. You know, being sucked dry. Like me, you're probably saying, but he gets everything he wants. I work and sacrifice just as much, if not more than he does. Those are his kids! He should WANT to give to them and make the sacrifice for them! You have to believe that is their heart, it's just a matter of perception. Men have a greater need for rewards and encouragement. (we will talk more about that later) During this time I encourage you to lay down your pride and trust that the Lord will reward you.

Father, bless my husband with wealth and honor, that he may not lack in what he desires for himself. I pray my husband keeps his heart right in You so when Your Word enters his heart, it will produce godly results in his life. I pray he guards his heart from the worries of this age, the deceitfulness of wealth, and the desire for other things. I declare these things will not enter in and choke the Word making it unfruitful in his life, because You've kept his heart.~Ecclesiastes 6:2; Mathew 13:22

(This prayer was shared from A Wife's Prayer~ Pamela Hines)

Blessing your husband, day 1

DAY 1

Let's lay the foundation.
This verse meets your every need.
Pray this over yourself and your spouse as often as it comes to mind and your heart throughout the day, everyday.

Proverbs 3:5-7


"I thank you Lord for causing (husbands name) to trust in you Lord with all his heart.
DO NOT LET (husbands name) lean on his own understanding; thank you for causing (husbands name) to acknowledge you in all his ways, and making his path straight. DO NOT ALLOW (husbands name) to be wise in his own eyes; cause (husbands name) to fear you Lord and to shun evil."


When we trust in the Lord, we obey Him; When we obey Him, we are blessed by Him. As your husband begins to trust and submit to the Lord you will begin to see more of the blessing of the Lord and His hand moving in all aspects of your life. The bible says that fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, and that wisdom leads to wealth, long life, and happiness. Do you see where I'm going with this? Let's get him walking on the straight path. Keep trusting GOD!

So enemy...you want to know who I am.

Wow! Looking through and reading my old blog post is amazing to me right now. Just last Christmas I wrote about how I was never going to let unforgiveness be a hinderance to me, not knowing that just a few weeks past that I would be faced walking into what would be the valley of the shadow of death to me. I, at least can say I have held true to my proclamation. I have had to forgive on a daily basis and ask for forgiveness as the Lord has brought things to my heart and mind. I can look back and read, and see how seeds were being deposited in me to build me up in the truth about the love of God and how that love has delivered me and made me the JUSTIFIED and RIGHTEOUSNESS of CHRIST! I had no idea the turn my life would take, but whoever does? As I embark on my new journey, I can understand why I am being tested now. I read an enemy attacks to test who you are, what you have learned, and steal the unborn seeds in you. There is some very powerful things in me. I am only beginning to realize just how powerful they are. My time is coming closer which is why it was time for me to enter into a period of refinement. No more time to waste or play games. I was meant to be somebody and to fulfill a purpose. I knew my purpose was always to bring people to the truth of salvation, but I didn't know the details or the depth. I never knew or thought God would use me to help marriages and strengthen families, or how much it represents the very vision and image of His love and salvation, which is why the foundations of families are being attacked and destroyed at such an alarming rate, and worse as we grow closer to the coming of Christ. Its kind of scary for me to write with such powerful and definite statements, as I realize I have to live up to them and they are out there for others to hold me to. I do so with confidence because I am already living what I proclaim, even though I have not completed my journey, and the victory has not fully been manifested yet. I was handed a verse on a piece of paper that read "Be strong and courageous, because you will lead these people to inherit the land I swore to their forefathers to give them." Josh 1:6 I knew immediately in my spirit thats what all this is about. No pain is without purpose and it is time for me to step up into my place of leadership and royalty. So enemy...you want to know who I am. I am a covenant daughter of the Most High and Living God! (daughter of a blood promise that cannot and will not fail!) I am the seed of Abraham (qualified daughter of the promise) I am the radiating righteousness of Jesus! (because of the sacrifice of His blood) I am more than a Conqueror! (through Christ Jesus who strengthens me!) I am the daughter of Sarah (I will not fear or be discouraged. I am a woman of purity and reverence, with unfading inner beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, who puts her trust in God and obeys her husband with a submissive spirit.) I am captain of the Lord's inheritance! (one established to pray for and lead His people, to help store up and release the good treasures of His heart to His people through prayer.) I am the Bride of Christ! ( His companion, one that has conquered all trials and stayed on the path of belief to sit next to Him on the throne and rule into eternity.) I am a king! (one who uses the authority given to me through Christ Jesus for HIS good pleasures! And my benefits! lol ) I am a STANDER!! I will not give up or let up my faith or trust in my God and Lord Jesus. He is greater than the fear! Greater than the pain! Greater than the circumstances!! Because He is the I AM...I AM Rachael....one of the chosen.

This Christmas!

This Christmas I was joyful as I felt the presence of the Lord lead me to truly love and forgive those that have deeply wounded and offended me. It was so liberating, not easy at first,but so meaningful. I had prayed and prayed for it to be a special kind of Christmas and finally asked what would make it special for Jesus. Giving His birth purpose and meaning, a celebration of the real reason for the holiday is what allowed me to share in His presence of abounding love, peace, and joy. He just wants us to truly love one another and forgive each other. He has said " if you Love me, then Obey me." (John 14:15) What greater gift to Jesus than to truly give our hearts in obedience to love and forgive each other even when it hurts, when that person might not ever know or truly understand just what you are doing. That's what makes it special because He knows, and He is a re-warder of those that diligently seek and obey Him.(Hebrews 11:6) "But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those that persecute you." (Mathew 5:44) Its also a sign of trust. Trusting that your Lord can heal you and fulfill His promise,such as "..heaping hot coals upon their heads!" lol (Proverbs 25:22)The Lord will reward your willingness and obedience. Honestly, the joy and peace that comes from forgiving really is more than enough! I might have to keep doing it a few times, but I am forever glad and not going to let unforgiveness hinder me in anything!

This Christmas I knew as soon as it started to feel frustrating and too commercial I had to quickly drop it into His hands and not be moved out of my peace. Getting upset because you can't buy the gifts you want, or because the world is stirring about you in chaos is not what Christmas is about. Its about remembering that GOD, the Father, Himself gave us HIS most precious gift of love. An awesome thought is knowing HE started the whole ritual of giving during this holiday called CHRISTMAS. First He gave us His son, then He gave His son great riches and provision through the hands and feet of 3 wise-men, and all the glory in heaven and earth through the shouts and praises of the angels, and through the kneeling of the wise-men. Think about it!

This Christmas I didn't put up a tree, but we got all the gifts we had hoped under it would be! lol I went to the phone store to buy my kids androids and wasn't getting much accomplished in affordable cost so I left. As I accepted that this Christmas He would have to be the gift giver, I went back to the store to receive two android phones for only $9.99 each, and all the accessories such as car chargers and phone cases for free.(Cuz that's how He do!) Went to purchase the kids some hair straighteners but they were all sold out of the ones I wanted to buy for them, but He provided some better ones later at a discounted price. New shoes that normally cost $65.00 were sitting only one pair in just the right size, in just the right hidden spot for a clearance price of $12.00 at Kohls. The Paris picture that my princess wanted had just been at the store was completely gone. Finally found it at another store and low and behold it scanned for $7.65 when it was tagged for $39.99 with no sale sign attached. Its okay to want to buy and give gifts, these things happened just this way so I would know it was HIM giving us the gifts this Christmas. He's so good! When it looks impossible you just have to say BUT GOD! Yes He can, and yes He will!

This Christmas I just wanted to share all that He had shared with me.

No Eye Has Seen, No Ear Has Heard

Ahh....the goodness of the Lord prevails again! This Halloween as I walked through our old neighborhood my heart became sad. I thought, there's my old house I never should have sold. My kids should be growing up here. I started to cry but then the Lords gentle whisper spoke to my heart. You don't want that house. Remember I have something better for you. A new life, a new house, new memories, a new joy! Ah yes Lord! A smile came to my face as my heart began to beat with a new song. His word began to flood my spirit with His living promises. "He will wipe away every tear from their eyes....for the (former) old order of things has passed away." Revelation 21:4 I couldn't even cry if I wanted to! I thought that is exactly what He has been working on in my heart lately. Trying to get me to move past all the old to bring me to the new. A new life! How far will I push through to it? How much am will willing to let go? At this point I am willing to let go of everything and everyone. I realize the "old" is not waiting for me, nor is it wanting me. Why should I hold onto it? Its really hard to just let go of the "old", but I am so confident and wanting of what is waiting for me in the "new." Yesterday His word came.." no eye had seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those that love Him." 1 Corinthians 2:9. Oh bring it Lord! I am so ready for your goodness! Man that excites me! We all know Jer. 29:11 " For I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future!" Can you say I have a new hope! A new future! Oops..now Im sounding like Obama here. Haha. No one, I mean no one, can keep me from His promises! My time is coming. I will have all that He said I could have! I will get double for my trouble. My "beginnings will seem humble, so prosperous will my future be." Can you say "winning"? Job 8:7 I could go on, but I'll close for now holding on the His promise that He will restore DOUBLE! that which we forfeit. Now think about that for a second. He doesn't owe us, but yet He is willing to give us double that which we let go. Tell me we don't have an awesome God! I gave up a house and really good job, but my God says He is going to give me double the house, double the job! I can't wait! He will restore those years that were lost and eaten up! He will renew our youth! I just can't stop! I have some much to expect and look forward to. As He said..No Eye Has Seen. No Ear Has Heard. There's just too much.

"Yet he has not left himself without testimony: He has shown kindness by giving you rain from heaven and crops in their seasons; He provides you with plenty of food and fills your hearts with joy.(that He does!) " Acts 14:17